The Diary.

This may seems like a scene from a flix whereby a diary that contains the family secret was found by someone.But dear readers,this is my life drama.


Does a man own a diary?Not
many I suppose and most that do owns are usually the sentimental men.

I found my father's diary while I was looking through his stuff.Going inside his room is painful but  I still go cos I wanted to face what gives me pain. "As I looked at the empty bed I recalled the last time I lay down by your side and you were ill "

I wonder if I am borderline mad cos the pain is also soothing.

It was  an ordinary black and red book that captured my eyes.Written during the year 2005.I took it home and started reading.

Bapak with the late HRH Sultan Idris of Perak,HRH Raja Perempuan Perak and Y.T.M.Raja Nazhatul Shima in Switzerland.

I was transported to  2005.Most of his time was spent abroad with HRH Sultan Pahang.He used the word HRH and I know who he meant.

(Bapak receiving the trophy when HRH horse won the race.)

My father managed HRH horses in the UK.So most of his time were with the horses.He seems to know a lot about horses from what he described.He knows when the horse is not in top form or when the horse is ready to win.He included his feelings too besides his work with HRH.

Then came the part that seems to cut my heart with a knife.As a man whose exposure to the kind of life he led, it's not strange to know that there are young women who used him for the money.He wrote about how the woman used him and then disappeared from his life.Women with no scruples should just rot now.No need to wait for hell!
Pak, I know the pain and mentioning about it here may be crude but well black is black.

I know  how much you love your grandchildren and how worried you were about your children.

Bapak with his granddaughter Alida in the UK

You wrote about how age had taken its toll on you and that you were tired of the travelling.I feel you Pak.You wrote about how proud you were because Azalia went to Sydney under the wings of Petronas.You described the day we sent Azalia off.It was on the 5th Feb 2005.You wrote about how Azalia cried when it was time for her to board the plane.

With my daughter Azalia

The moments you spent with Chor and family in the UK.You mentioned Greg and it hit me that both of you are no longer with us.

I had mixed feelings upon reading your diary.Anger to the ones that hurt and used you.Sadness and most of all love.



You will be loved by us till the end of time.Al Fatihah

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He Speaks Russian..

It was on my 2nd day at Teluk Nipah that I met Addam.He is one of the beach boys that caters for tourist the water sports and island hopping.

"Cantik bunga" I heard him commenting on the flower clip on my hair.Thats how I got to know this friendly guy.I supposed that's his sales gimmick.Then he asked us if we want to go boating around the island.60rm he said for the 3 of us.We accepted and I am glad we did cos it was an experience for us.

Like other beach resorts or island,there are bound to be beach boys who earns their livelihood by taking tourist on boat rides and  and indulge in sea sport.

Addam and his gang are like those guys except that he could speak Russian as well as 8 other languages.

We all know that selling is not easy.You need to have the skill in talking your way to impress your customers.

While we were talking, a group of Indians came and he convinced them to take his boat by speaking in Tamil.Well done Addam!

He created his own job with his skill about the sea and the boat.He has others working for him too.He finds the customers and his friends ride the boats etc. Social Business is what I think this is.

I guess I am selling Addam here because he is hardworking and kind plus he speaks Russian!

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Ombak melambai

Here is my tale of doing things without a plan,an impromptu getaway from the same old scene.A holiday in an island of our own country.

Sunset watching in Pangkor

As I lay here on the hammock by the sea with the soothing sounds of the wave, I could feel that life is for living and that although there are sad  days and grievance moments,there are also beautiful days and perhaps a bit of happy moments that comes after all that.Life has a way of balancing it for us.

I lost my father last April and like others,I grieved.Nothing seems to excite me nor make me happy.I was not really 'into it'.Tidak ada yang memberi happiness.

Then two days ago, my elder sister invited me and my daughter to go to Pangkor island.'My treat 'she said and I obviously agreed.We took a bus from Ipoh to Lumut and then catch the ferry across.(this info is for those who do not have a car to travel)
We had already booked a chalet for 3 at the Nipah Bay Villa which was rather cheap.It is not a posh hotel but being hippies at heart we are not into lavishness anyway.Lavish lifestyle scares me.I am a carefree person.A grandmother who still wear shorts by the beach so there.

Our chalet is clean and comfy.As I am writing this I am enjoying the breeze on my face.My sister is busy sewing and my daughter is reading.

Today is our third day in Pangkor.Kami menginap di Teluk Nipah.When I first arrived I was surprised to see that Pangkor has changed.Much cleaner  and pretty.Thanks to Dato Sri Zambry,the previous MB.

The new floating mosque in Pangkor

I absolutely love Teluk Nipah because here is what you dubbed as 'a happening place'.Rows of stalls selling souvenirs and cheap food.Tourist from all over are mostly here because it is the kind of life that is entirely different from theirs.

On our 2nd day we went into the quaint town and had lunch there.Then we went island hopping with a guide who was extra friendly.The adrenaline rush as the boat speeds took me by surprise and this young guide showed us all the rock formation that resembles crocodile,turtle and many more.My sis and I being old couldn't figure out the resemblance but my daughter could!Then he showed us the part of the sea where the blue eyed ikan bilis could be found.A treasure for the fishermen.For those who love snorkeling,there is an island that caters for that activity.The sea is clear and fishes are visible from the boat.Amazing view for me who cannot swim let alone snorkeling!

You must go island hopping in Pangkor.Then you will appreciate Mother Nature.Dear all,please do not pollute the sea.

From the adventure at sea we then went to feed hornbills.Apparently it is one of the most sought out activity here.The guy called Nazim has been feeding the hornbills for the past 16 years."Cepat le Nazim" I said."Sabor Kak ,burung ni akan datang bila dah kurang matahari."he said

The waiting game was worth it  because suddenly about ten birds with their huge beak came really near to us.Then the feeding starts.These birds were fed bananas and we are allowed to hold a banana and the bird will fly and snatch the bananas from our fingers.It was so exciting.There is no fee but one can give any amount as donation.Afterall bananas are not cheap.

Of course watching the sunset is part of the ritual of a beach holiday.God's painting and the sky as the canvas.Magnificient!

Today is our 4th day.Menghirup kopi di balcony.We haven't decided what to do for today yet but for now life is a bliss.

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